It's Just So Understated.

True to form the Yankees are currently in the initial stages of formulating a trade for the generously attractive Minnesota Twins' pitcher Johan Santana. I've always liked Johan Santana, and it goes without saying he has little ambition outside the diamond and the kitchen, and is attractive enough and would look good enough in pinstripes, plus if the Yankees are able to convince Andy to come back the two of them will have so much to talk about. What with imaginary things and all. There is little word as to whom the Twins would like in exchange, although my money has to be on Joba Chamberlain. Everyone says no, but I just have to say one, he kinda flipped over a bunch of gnats, and two, there are a lot of players that look better in that uniform. Maybe if you could find some gnats to chase him out of his local Wendy's and into a gym somewhere it might all work out, but until then...

I guess everyone has heard that Major League Baseball has approved the incentives in RoRo's contract essentially paying bonuses each time RoRo ties the top 4 all time home run leaders, and also when he surpasses the first. But did you know that RoRo is baseball's "sensitive boy", and apparently has a thing for strip clubs? I have no idea if it's true or not, but I read it on this blog.

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So yesterday it was alpha dogging "designers" and today it just has to be about xmas. I seem to be hearing a lot about xian charity and all that jazz, and obviously I find it laugh out loud hilarious, but nonetheless I also resent it. Not merely in terms of the unspoken assumptions, but also with respect to the blatant opportunism. To be honest xmas shows xians at their absolute worst. It's a time when everyone collectively absolves themselves from the needs and the plight of others less fortunate and absentmindedly basks in unbridled indulgence and mince pies. Not that I mind that passive ambivalence or anything and lord knows I always love me some mince pie, but I don't go out and spend boat loads of money on my family and friends and then tell myself that it's all about the imaginary things in life. And I certainly would never hand over a pittance of cash to some charity and hope to absolve the guilt I feel over a pair of $700 calfskin gloves. I just wouldn't.