We Were Fashioned For Delight.

Accidents sometimes happen and when they do you are occasionally left staring at a plate of delicious soba noodles with a spicy eggplant ragout splashed all across your floor. I have a habit of dropping shit here and there sort of randomly, and am in a constant state of acquiring additional china and glassware as a result so I'm not altogether surprised to be staring at the mess on our floor. I almost expected it and planned ahead and remember I resolved to be unflappable so I just clean it up and eat the extra helping that I prepared. Fancy.

Of course not having leftovers means I have to heat up a frozen sack  of Stoufers sodium muck in the kitchen. I have to wait while others heat their sad estimations of casseroles and lasagnas. Nearly a half an hour I spend listening to the news, looking at some licensing agreements, nod off, and then finally get a place in the kitchen with my favorites Ross, Rachel, Joey, Chandler and the other two.

It's sad and the overfed secretaries trade stories of empowerment at the hands of their domineering bosses. I imagine it's like reading Fifty Shades of Grey and go back to Rachel's issues.  After lunch I eat enough marijuana laced chocolate to make a beagle think it's a parrot. One hour later I'm laughing uncontrollably at the wording of a Chinese film distribution agreement. I get on twitter, then the internet proper, I leave some horrifyingly offensive and anonymous comments on some random news stories I don't give a shit about. I say goodbye to a couple of people I don't know and head home.

This is putting a positive spin on things.