Fragments Of Memory

On Friday we had a bit of a scare. Well some people did. I was always safely on the 40th floor of the Wells Fargo Centre. As I was downstairs on the terrace enjoying a cigarette away from the incessantly annoying co-workers of mine I noticed a mushroom cloud rising above the Hollywood sign. I thought "Thank God, someone's finally nuked the Valley." Sadly, it was simply a brushfire caused by two hoodlums playing with fireworks. This picture is taken by some anonymous person on flickr.com who is obviously impressed with such things as smoke and bright colors and shiny things.

On Sunday Compadre and I had to jet over to Ikea. The Burbank one, not the Covina one. There may be something important about Burbank, but I certainly wouldn't know. But it was here that I came to the shattering realization that I wouldn't be getting the new Jumpman Jeter Vitals. Not because they sold out or because I couldn't find them. It's just that they are so completely hideous. As hideous as anything else with the Jordan brand on it. And I just don't think it's me. There are some things I just can't do. Bridges I will not cross. Mayonaises I will not eat. And while perusing the plastic tables at Ikea, Compadre and I had a deep discussion about how it would be preferable to get a new pair of Dior jeans while Hedi Slimane is still working there. For the best really.

I also realized that there is no evil more heinous than an unassembled Ikea bed. Born from the flaming pits of Mount Doom, and arriving in a suction packed box, the lumbering spectre of wickedness known as the Dalsev has now been completely assembled, and is now haunting my bungalow. I always tell myself that I'm never going to buy another piece of furniture at Ikea, and each and every time I just lie to myself. I'm a liar is what I am.

The wait has been tough, at times unbearable. Maybe not so much for Doo. But opening day is finally here. My Yankees will be playing some girls called The Devil Rays today at 10:05 PST. I'm just sitting here on pins and needles. I can't wait until the game is streamed through my interweb. I think I told you all about how nicely the players fill out their uniforms this early in the season. If you have any means of watching the game by all means do. I think some of my co-workers are going to Dodger's opening day. Whatever.