Meticulously Planned Lapses In Judgment.

Apparently the cease and desist letter went out with immediate effect.  Orders were cancelled in front of influencer audience's eyes, commentary was given, and one of the housewives from who-knows-where went from being mildly philosophical and counter-monoculture to resigned and realpolitik in two tiks and a tok.

Hermes has been finding itself embroiled in all sorts of litigation of late.  First the Kelly antitrust brouhaha which I regret to say no one has asked me to work on (yet), then the EU investigations, the Peta allegations, I mean one would think Hermes were in league with OPEC nations the way regulators are riding their dick.  

The biggest problem Hermes faces, however, may not be in big government overreach, but in brand dilution and douchism.  Too many people (and lets just say it the wrong sort) got their hands (or pretend to have their hands) on what used to be niche and mildly exclusive.  Gone are the times when you could walk into Hermes and you would be the only person in the shop and the SAs would fight over your tiny agenda refill purchase.  

I can't speak intelligently about what shopping in Hermes is like now it has been neigh over a decade since I darkened their Rodeo Drive hall.  If Drake is bragging about how many purses he buys from Hermes then it is not a place where people like me shop.  Sorry.

I've brought two Hermes SAs to tears, quite a few more to babbling incoherence and that's just from memory.  One I left trembling after her misguided and clumsy attempt to compliment my Lucien Pellat-Finet and I'm suppose to treat these shopkeepers like gatekeepers OK.

And the real influencers can actually be seen in a theatre quite removed from South Coast Plaza or Rodeo, but at the local CalRanch.  Far fewer Cal Ranch stores than Hermes, but that is only partially relevant. 

Sorry to shoot off-topic, but I popped into the local CR with my pops just to see if they had any post-Holiday sales and it was dreary and full-priced.  A couple influencers with designer dogs were eyeing the wall of Carhartt overalls and I was sadly picking through their much diminished selection of Caterpillar hoodies.  The Dickies was also depleted, the Wranglers were picked-over but who cares.  People are posting their asses on Insta like they're me in 2018 ffs.  The $70 501s were marked down to $42, but that is what they were priced retail a few years ago.  Their boots were a mad state.  $140 for the Carhartt chelsea boot I thought I'd need a sturdy shoulder to hold onto just to get out of the store.  Lucky my dad bought a new snow shovel that served the same purpose.

If Hermes actually makes as many handbags as these influencers would have us believe then they would need to own several dozen factories, and an international distribution system to beat Lululemon.  Is it really like that?  I suspect not.  Meanwhile my ability to spot and acquire legit vintage Hermes at knock-down prices on Ebay flourishes because these fools are like the puking frat boy you left at the afterparty hours ago.  Good luck finding your way home with the lights off.